What does it mean to be ready for the adoption process? In this video, I offer a mental checklist that you should be checking off before you embark on this journey. Being prepared for adoption is not just about having a nursery or completing your home study, it is just as much about your mental and emotional preparation.
If you’re married or have a partner through this process, make sure you are on the same page. Make sure that…
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You both want to adopt.
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You’re both okay with bringing in and raising a child that’s not biologically yours.
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You know what races, exposures, and levels of openness with your child’s birth family you’re both open to.
This is so necessary and I cannot tell you how often I see spouses on completely different pages when it comes to adoption. The key here is communication, open-minded discussion, and listening to one another.
For those of you that have struggled with infertility, you must give yourself the time to properly mourn that journey before jumping in the adoption process. This means allowing time for grieving before moving on. Will the pain and grief from this chapter of your life ever completely go away? No, I still find myself crying sometimes when I tell my story and it shocks me because I think I am over it. Ultimately, you must decide if you’re in a place to move on.
Feeling anxious? That is completely normal. You are stepping outside of your comfort zone when embarking on your adoption journey. Things may feel intrusive at times, but it is important for you to trust the process. Tune into your nervous energy and make it a priority to check in on your mental and physical health throughout the process.
Is life just getting in the way? You might be thinking…“yes, I am ready,” but then life throws you a curveball. Ultimately, you have to know that throughout your journey something may come up and put a halt in your adoption process. You may have to take a step back and that is okay! However, you need to let your team, that you have built around you, know what is going on and allow for them to help you. You cannot be a lone wolf through this process, you must look to your tribe for support through the difficult things that come with life.
If you are a single parent, be convicted in your decision. This one goes for everyone else too. You are going to get a lot of opinions from a lot of people that you didn’t ask for. So you’re going to have to be able to thank them (or don’t) for their opinion and tell them that you’re happy about your decision to adopt. The first step to being ready for the adoption process is being 100% sure about wanting to adopt. This allows you to move past and be unaffected by unwanted comments, opinions, and thoughts on YOUR life decisions.
What else does it take to truly be ready for the adoption process? Check out this video and I will give more insight on what questions to ask of yourself so you can know if you are ready.