The number one thing I’ve learned after adopting transracially, is that representation matters! If I could teach one thing to families that are adopting outside of their race it would be that.
It’s so important to have positive role models that mirror your children so they can see relate and see themselves in that person and what/who they can become. It’s a “seeing is believing” sort of mindset.
Both of my children love to go to the Barber Shop/Salon where the majority of the barbers/beauticians are black as well as the clientele. It’s where I, as a white mother learn important information on hair and skin care. I ask questions and listen, as I am not the expert.
During the holidays, I fill our house with Black nativities, Santas, nutcrackers, ballerinas, wrapping paper, etc. that mirror my children’s African American heritage to allow them that relatability.
Throughout the year we seek out cultural activities, exhibits, we travel to places where we as parents are the minority and have bookshelves of books with little boys and girls that look just like our children.
I’m still learning, every single day, and I look to and listen to Black voices for their expertise and experience to pass on to my children.
Rachel Patten is an RG Adoption Consultant and mother of two through transracial adoption. You can read her full bio here.