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"I can't thank RG Adoption Consulting enough for helping me create my family."

Kristin, California

 

Kristin’s Story

I have always known I would have kids one day.  I was waiting for the right time and Mr. Right.  After a few life-changing events, I realized I needed to go after what I wanted – which was to be a mom. So I decided to take the leap of faith and jump into the world of adoption.

Once I made that decision to move forward with adoption, a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulders. As a single woman looking to be a single mom by choice with a full-time job, I knew I needed help navigating the world of adoption.

Why not have someone on my team that knows the ins and outs of adoption? I asked around on a Facebook group for single mothers, and RG Adoption Consulting came highly recommended. I loved that Becca was a single mom by choice herself. After calling Becca and talking, I knew this was the right decision. It just felt right. There was now a light at the end of the tunnel. A tunnel that had seemed never-ending previously when thinking about creating my family as a single mom by choice.

Working with RG Adoption Consulting was amazing! I love that they didn’t overwhelm me with the process. We took things one step at a time. Because of this I was actually able to get everything done faster.

The online community is amazing and I was able to connect to other clients and ask them about their experiences. They are such a great resource to lean on. I definitely feel like some of the other single moms will be forever in my life. And I can’t wait to help future single moms within the RG community!

Rachel, my consultant, was such one the best parts of my journey. She always laid out the positives and negatives so I could really make an informed decision. When things got stressful or uncertain, I knew I could call her and talk through what I should do. I am so glad I had her on my side to be my voice of reason. Even though I was on this journey as a single woman, I never felt like I was alone.

One obstacle I could not have overcome without Rachel was my first match, which failed. It was my first match and I thought it was the perefct fit! I was so excited. Unfortunately, the birth mom disappeared 3 months before she was due. So I made the difficult decision, with Rachel, to fail the adoption. I lost money BUT I decided that I just couldn’t sit around and wait for 3 months. If she wanted to parent, that was her choice. So I moved on and went active again with a few agencies.

I felt like I was starting over.  Who knew how long it would be to rematch as a single mom.  I questioned everything I had in place. Should I redo my book? What if its not good enough? Was the first match a fluke?

Thankfully, it didn’t take me long to rematch. My second match was night and day different! It truly was a whirlwind. I spoke to my expectant mother on the phone, thinking it was a call for her to decide between me and another family.I was SO wrong. She had already picked me! We talked for an hour and she immediately jumped into questions about names and circumcision. I was not quite ready for those questions, but I was so excited to finally be matched again.

My favorite moment by far during my adoption journey was the day my son was born. I was out with my mom when I got THE call. Come fast! She’s in labor!

I was on a plane within two hours. I must mention that he was 6 weeks early—so this was not what I thought was going to happen that day! That day is one big blur, but I will never forget walking into the hospital. This was the first time I would meet my expectant mother and I was SO nervous.

When the social worker and I walked in, she was crying. We sat down and waited for them to bring our son in. She wanted me to meet him. Once they brought him, she immediately said to give him to his mom—ME. It was surreal. I sat and talked to my son’s birth mom for two hours. I treid to get to know her but 2 hours is not much time! I could have stayed all night but I wanted her to have the night alone with our son. A special moment they would always have together.

My son’s birth dad questioned whether or not he wanted to place my son with me. He hadn’t met me and was having a hard time with it. But we met, talked, and he realized I was the right person to parent his son.

What started as a stressful situation was mediated into a happy one. I reassured him that I wanted him to be in my son’s life and that I would not cut him out. I have kept my promise, and he is so grateful to have received the pictures and updates I have sent to the agency thus far. I know that we will continue building our relationship and  that my son will not only get to know him, but also his full siblings.

I’ll be honest, adoption is not for everyone. You have to be adapatable and be okay with change, sometimes at a moment’s notice. You can have super high highs and super low lows, all in one day. It’s stressful and things fluctuate so fast. If I could give myself any piece of advice it would be to stay patient. But also don’t be afraid to take that leap of faith and jump if it feels right.

The right child will find you. This is something I told myself every day of this journey. You can handle anything that is thrown your way. Just remember to be present, to breathe, and use your village to get through it.

I am so glad that my consultant, Rachel, was a part of that village. She was the perfect consultant for me, as she always knew what to say while still letting me make my own choices. This was so needed as a single woman, as I had no “partner” to bounce my thoughts off of. When things started to fall apart, she was my voice of reason. I seriously do not know what I would have done without Rachel and RGAC by my side.

I can’t thank RG Adoption Consulting enough for helping me create my family. RGAC definitely made the world of adoption a little less daunting. It was an emotional roller coaster that was BEYOND worth it. Once my son was in my arms, I just knew he was the one.

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