"I absolutely loved being a part of a larger network of RG families and having that connection with other single women who have adopted."
Stephanie, Illinois
I never questioned that I wanted to be a mother, and yet, never in a million years did I think that I would be adopting as a single mother.
After a few relationships that didn’t quite pan out and watching two of my good friends become single mothers by choice, I decided to embark on my own journey to motherhood. I was blessed to have the full support of my family and friends during this process! After two years of attempting to become pregnant through fertility means, I decided it was time to move on to starting the adoption process to build my family.
I found a home study organization to work with right off the bat, but after a ton of research I was still feeling overwhelmed and stuck on the decision of what adoption agency to work with. I remembered that few friends who were also considering adoption had recommended RG Adoption Consulting, so I decided to set up a call.
After speaking with Rebecca, reading the RGAC website and all of the success stories, I knew that working with RG Adoption Consulting was the route for me! Their approach of signing up with several agencies with lower upfront fees was genius. And beyond that, they proved to be invaluable in so many other ways!
The best thing about working with RG Adoption Consulting, especially as a single mom, was having my consultant, Devin, to discuss potential adoption situations with, ask questions and guide me through the process. The online client community also provided such useful information and support. I absolutely loved being a part of a larger network of RG families and having that connection with other single women who have adopted. When I found out that I matched with my daughter’s birth parents (less than 48 hours before she was born), I was able to really lean on the online community to find a gift idea that would be appropriate for the birth parents without much planning time.
I was shocked by how quickly the process ended up being from start to finish! I finished my home study at the end of November, had my profile completed by the end of January and then applied to agencies at the beginning of February.
At times it felt like I had been waiting forever. Given that I was 2 years into my path to motherhood as a single parent, I had a hard time being patient! Right when I was starting to question how long it would take for me to adopt and if I should sign up for a 4th agency, I got the call from the adoption agency about a last minute, perfect situation for me! Finding out I was finally chosen was one of the best moments of my journey. I was playing a game with my nieces when I got the phone call that changed my life!
I matched with my daughter’s birth parents 24 hours before the expectant mom was supposed to be induced. Luckily, the induction got pushed back about 12 hours, but there was still a lot of scrambling to book last minute travel arrangements from Chicago and get some of the necessary baby items. All this occurred right when the COVID-19 shutdown happened, which actually made traveling last minute a lot easier!
However, the global pandemic did make a few things harder. I wasn’t able to meet the expectant parents prior to my daughter’s birth. We did talk on the phone and via FaceTime once I arrived in Arizona. I finally met them and my daughter, in person, for the first time in the delivery room. The absolute best moment of my journey was holding my daughter for the first time. I was so overwhelmed with joy and couldn’t believe that my dream had finally come true.
We spent 2 weeks in Arizona and got to see the birth parents and grandma a few times after discharge from the hospital. I truly cherish the time we got to spend together. Nowadays we communicate primarily through text messages, and continue to honor and build our open adoption relationship.
My daughter’s birth mother has also connected me with the families who adopted my daughter’s half brothers. We are all on a group text message now! I hope that we can continue to grow our relationship and that we get to visit again when the pandemic is over.
If I could give myself one piece of advice it would be to be patient, trust in the process and to enjoy the steps to get there. Knowing this from the beginning would have helped to lessen the stress and anxiousness I felt, and I will have to keep this in mind if and when I adopt again!
